The kids new sport - BMX riding

Near our house is the Visalia Sports park which has tons of events and things for the kids to do. They have five huge playgrounds, 6 or more soccer fields, a water park in the summer time and they just completed a new phase with 6 baseball fields and a huge BMX track. a few weeks ago I took the kids and their best friends Lauren and Maddie out to the BMX bike track to watch.

I met the owner of the BMX track, Ron, and he introduced all of the bike equipment to the kids and showed them the basics of how to ride the track. Ron had bikes, helmets and gloves available for all of the kids to use until we decide that they are gonna stick with the sport.

I learned that you can’t just use any bike to ride the tracks. Most bikes are way too heavy to ride over the hills and jumps. They have special bikes, “BMX bikes” that are especially made for the sport. I just always assumed that BMX bikes were just a style of bike! I guess it goes to say, “Ya learn somethin’ new everyday!”

Josh and

Christopher were “gung -ho” to start riding, while the girls stood and watched for awhile. Then Allie saw other little girls “rockin’ the track” so she wanted to be cool and try too! Lauren followed suit while little Maddie girl still stood on the sidelines and watched. After much coaxing, I got Maddie to try. It took the BMX coach Ron, and another parent of a BMX kid to help get her lined up straight and balanced on the starting gate so she wouldn’t fall when the gate dropped! She took off with a shaky start, fell off of the bike on one of the last hills, but then came back totally psyched! By the end of the day I had to practically pry Maddie girl off of the bike!

Allie girl did so well, and she too, had to be practically dragged off of the track. Josh is an absolute natural and he kept winning first place in all of the races! I can tell that he is gonna take this sport all of the way and end up in the Olympics or as some extreme sports guy! One of the girls on the BMX team here in Visalia just got accepted to compete in the next olympic season - She’s sixteen!! Christopher also loves this sport and spends hours on the track. Even our little neighbor friend, Lauren, loved riding and took to it very well!

The kids have been coming to the track

regularly now, and they have started training at BMX practice on Monday evenings. I love sitting out there in the bleachers and watching their little faces light up on that track, enjoying this new found love of BMX riding! I’ll keep y’all updated as to their progress, and prayerfully with no major "spills" to report about!

I posted this quote by C.S. Lewis back in February of 2006, but I felt it noteworthy to post again . . .

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal.

Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, and irredeemable" . . . .

~C.S. Lewis

This is my prayer . . .

O Lord, please keep my heart ever tender before you - open up my heart to give and receive love, no matter how badly I've been wounded by people and their cold, selfish ways. I ask that you would break up the hard, stone-like places where my heart needs your touch. I am asking that you would heal my heart, and touch the inner places of my heart and spirit, so that I can be vulnerable and willing to love again, without reservation or mistrust. I yearn for my heartbeat to follow the rhythms of Your heartbeat. I long for my life to move in the direction towards the sound of Your compassionate voice. Teach me to love as You love - for You are the meaning of love, and the one and only reason why I have any capacity to love at all. I was made to love You and be loved by You.

This is the hope of my calling . . .

~ Nikki Fairbanks

Jude 1:14-25

Enoch, the seventh after Adam, prophesied of them: " Look! The Master comes with thousands of holy angels to bring judgement against them all, convincing each person of every defiling act of shameless sacrilege, of every dirty word they have spewed of their pious filth." These are the "grumpers," the bellyachers, grabbing for the biggest piece of the pie, talking big, saying anything they think will get them ahead.

But Remember, dear friends, that the apostles of our Master, Jesus Christ, told us this would happen: "In the last days there will be people who don't take these things seriously anymore. They'll treat them like a joke, and make a religion of their own whims and lusts." These are the ones who split churches, thinking only of themselves. There's nothing to them, no sign of the Spirit!

But you, dear friends, carefully build yourselves up in this most holy faith by praying in the Holy Spirit, staying right at the center of God's love, keeping your arms open and outstretched, ready for the mercy of our Master, Jesus Christ. This is the unending life, the real life!

Go easy on those who hesitate the faith. Go after those who take the wrong way. Be tender with sinners, but not soft on sin. The sin itself stinks to high heaven.

And now to Him who can keep you on your feet, standing tall in this bright presence, fresh and celebrating - to our one God, our only Savior, through Jesus Christ, our Master, be glory, majesty, strength, and rule before all time, and now, and to the end of all time. Yes.

~ The Message Bible

Day in Sequoia Park

Today I drove my boys up to the Sequoia National Park for a day of hiking. It was such a beautiful day today, and even the drive up there was enjoyable. The boys and I had a wonderful time surrounded by God's beautiful scenery filled with His glorious nature.

Joshua was being his usual self being an adventurous, curious, climbing little monkey!

We drove up to The Giant Forest, which was about 45 minutes into the park. When we arrived, we walked thru the little museum they had for visitors there. The boys had fun reading about all of the super cool nature facts and games they had.

We picked a hiking trail that led to the "World's biggest tree". Halfway there however, the boys got too tired, so we all decided to hike back to the trailhead.

We had fun nevertheless! I love being able to spend quality alone time with my children. They are the most precious little ones to me in the whole world!! They also appreciate the fact that I am able to focus on just them, and no one else on our special days together. It lets them know that they are valued and that I deeply love and care for them . . .

A New Beginning . . .

"God is not asking me not to be sad that this chapter in my life has come to a close. Rather, He is asking me to turn the page and let a new chapter in my life begin" . . . .

This new chapter is called . . . "A New Beginning" . . . . .

~ Nikki Fairbanks

To be Loved . . .

Tonite I watched the movie, "Twilight" again for the third time with my family. Every time I see that movie, I am intrigued and completely enamored with the way that Edward completely and selflessly loves Bella. He protects her, watches over her and simply cannot stand to be away from the object of his affection. . .

These are the things that I think every woman truly desires in her heart of hearts. Edward, because he is a vampire, thinks he is a monster - but to Bella, he is the definition of perfection. She simply won't be swayed by the disapproval of what others think; her gaze is locked on this chivalrous, timeless man who would run to the ends of the earth, to make sure his forever love is safe and protected from anything that would pose a threat to her well-being, and more importantly, her life.

Thought to be beautiful, precious, cherished, endlessly loved, adored, chivalrous towards her, honored, respected, a priceless gem, a true princess, mercy continually bestowed upon, a heart completely ravished, the rush of adrenaline and blood pulsing through his veins at the mere thought of her, the wild and erratic beating of his heart, the sudden and electric charge in the atmosphere when she enters a room, endless grace and forgiveness, love as strong as death, the way he sets her as a seal upon his heart, as a permanent imprint, telling the world that she's won his heart, the very object of his affection, single mindedness towards her, gratitude and thankfulness of heart for her life, an unspoken, founded, heart-bound trust that knows where their equal affections and true devotions lie, conveying to her that even in her many weaknesses, she is still lovely to him, many waters not able to quench his fiery, passionate, burning love for her, yearning, longing thoughts of her constantly on his mind, the selfless act of laying down his life for her, "the true apple of his eye". . .

These are all of the thoughts that Jesus thinks of me as His bride! And though I long and yearn in my heart of hearts for an earthly husband to love me and think of me this way, at least I know that the King of this universe loves me completely and purely without reservation. And some day face to face, I will have the honor of meeting this beautiful man who loves me more than I'll ever truly comprehend, and who holds me endearingly close to His heart. I can rest assured that He will never leave me, abandon me or forsake me, and that I can trust Him with all of my heart, mind, body soul and spirit. I know with confidence that I AM His favorite one; and so are you . . .

We are "The Apple of His Eye" . . .

~ I will Give My Love An Apple ~

I will give my love an apple without e'er a core

I will give my love a house without e'er a door,

I will give my love a palace wherein she may be,

But she may unlock it without any key.

My head is the apple without e'er a core,

My mind is the house without e'er a door.

My heart is the palace wherein she may be

And she may unlock it without e'er a key.

The Shack

The other day I was having quite an in depth conversation with my mom about why we have to experience such heartache and pain in our lifetime. I haven't been able to make sense of a lot of things that have happened to me throughout almost all of my adult life, and I have had so many questions about why God would allow these things to happen to me; after all, He is the God of love and peace, right? He does want the best for His children, doesn't He?

In the process of our conversation, my mom highly suggested that I read this book called, The Shack, as it contained many of the answers to some really hard questions that have been "burning a hole" in my heart. I am almost done with the book, and it has literally changed my perspective of life and how I see God as a Father and friend. It has helped me to see God in a whole different light.

To give you a little bit of insight to the book, God comes to the main character in the book, named "Mack", in the form of a African woman named, "Papa". This is a true story by the way. Though it is a little lengthy, please read this excerpt from one of the chapters titled, "A meeting of Hearts" . . .

~ The Shack ~
"A Meeting of Hearts"

"But why do you love me?" I mean, why Mackenzie Allen Phillips? Why do you love someone who is such a screw up? After all the things I've felt in my heart towards you and all the accusations I've made, why would you even bother to keep trying to get through to me? "Because that is what love does," answered Papa. "Remember, Mackenzie, I don't wonder what you will do or what choices you will make. I already know. Let's say, for example, I am trying to teach you how not to hide inside lies - hypothetically, of course," she said with a wink. "And let's say that I know it will take you forty-seven situations and events before you will actually hear me - that is, before you will hear clearly enough to agree with me and change. So when you don't hear me the first time, I'm not frustrated or disappointed, I'm thrilled. Only forty-six more times to go! And that first time will be a building block to construct a bridge of healing that one day - that today - you will walk across."
"Okay, now I'm feeling guilty," he admitted.
"Let me know how that works for you." Papa chuckled.
"Seriously, Mackenzie, it's not about feeling guilty. Guilt'll never help you find freedom in me. The best it can do is make you try harder to conform to some ethic on the outside. I'm about the inside."
"But what you said, I mean, about hiding inside lies. I guess I've done that one way or another most of my life."
"Honey, you're a survivor. No shame in that. Your daddy hurt you something fierce. Life hurt you."
"Lies are one of the easiest places for survivors to run. They give you a sense of safety, a place where you have to depend only on yourself. But it's a dark place, isn't it?"

"So dark," Mack muttered with a shake of his head.
"But are you willing to give up the power and safety it promises you? That's the question."What do you mean?" asked Mack, looking up at her.

"Lies are a little fortress; inside them you can feel safe and powerful. Through your little fortress of lies you try to run your life and manipulate others. But the fortress needs walls, so you build some. These are the justifications for your lies. You know, like you are doing this to protect someone you love, to keep them from feeling pain. Whatever works, just so you feel okay about the lies."

"But the reason I didn't tell Nan about the note was because it would have caused her so much hurt."
"See? There you go, Mackenzie, justifying yourself. What you just said is a bold-faced lie, but you can't see it." She leaned forward. "Do you want me to tell you what the truth is?"
Mack knew Papa was going deep, and somewhere inside he was both relieved to be talking about this and tempted to almost laugh out loud. He was no longer embarrassed by it. "No-o-o-o." He drew his answer out slowly and smirked up at her. "But go ahead anyway."

She smiled back and then grew serious. "The truth is, Mack, the real reason you did not tell Nan was not because you were trying to save her from pain. The real reason was that you were afraid of having to deal with the emotions you might have encountered, both from her and in yourself. Emotions scare you, Mack. You lied to protect yourself, not her!"
"And furthermore," she continued, "Such a lie is unloving. In the name of caring about her, your lie became an inhibitor in your relationship with her, and in her relationship with me. If you had told her, maybe she would be here with us now.
Papa's words hit Mack like a punch in the stomach. "You wanted her to come too?"
"That was your decision and hers, if she had ever been given the chance to make it. The point is, Mack, you don't know what would have happened because you were so busy 'protecting' Nan.

And again he was floundering in guilt. "So, what do I do now?"
"You tell her, Mackenzie. You face the fear of coming out of the dark and tell her, and you ask her forgiveness and let her forgiveness heal you. Ask her to pray for you, Mack. Take the risks of honesty. When you mess up again, ask for forgiveness again. It's a process, honey, and life is real enough without having to be obscured by lies. And remember, I am bigger than your lies. I can work beyond them. But that doesn't make them right or stop the damage they do or the hurt they cause others."

"What if she won't forgive me?" Mack knew that this was indeed a very deep fear that he lived with. It felt safer to continue to throw new lies on the growing pile of old ones.
"Ah, that is the risk of faith, Mack. Faith does not grow in the house of certainty. I am not here to tell you that Nan will forgive you. Perhaps she won't or can't, but my life inside you will appropriate risk and uncertainty to transform you by your own choices into a truth teller, and that will be a miracle greater than raising the dead."
Mack sat back and let her words sink in. "Will you please forgive me?" Mack finally offered.

"Did that a long time ago, Mack. If you don't believe me, ask Jesus. He was there . . ."

Love =

To put it simply . . . Love = putting someone else's good ahead of your own . . . Think about that. . .

Your growing environment . . .

I was walking through Target today browsing through the book aisle for a new, good read. Out of the corner of my eye I glanced at a book by a preacher named Joel Osteen titled, Become a Better You. I went back and picked it up and bought it, despite my hesitance to "big time" TV preachers. As I was reading tonight however, I have to say I was pleasantly surprised at this man's God given gift for encouragement and Godly wisdom. I had an epiphany this evening about our dreams and plans and the discouragement that comes when they are suddenly stifled.

Here's what Mr. Osteen writes . . .

"The dream in your heart may be bigger than the environment in which you find yourself. Sometimes you have to get out of that environment in order to see that dream fulfilled. Consider an oak tree. If you plant it in a pot, it can grow no further. The problem is not with the tree; it is with the environment. It is stifling growth. Perhaps you have bigger things in your heart than your present environment can facilitate. That's why, at times, God will stir you out of a comfortable situation. When you go through persecution and rejection, it's not always because somebody has it in for you. Sometimes that's God's way of directing you into His perfect will. He's trying to get you to stretch to the next level. He knows you're not going to go without a push, so He'll make it uncomfortable for you to stay where you are currently. The mistake we make at times is getting negative and sour; we focus on what didn't work out. When we do that, we inhibit the opening of new doors.

Throughout life, we're not always going to understand everything that happens along the way. But we've got to learn to trust God. We've got to believe that He has us in the palm of His hand, that He is leading and guiding us, that He always has our best interests at heart. Somebody may have rejected you, but you can hold your head up high knowing this: God accepts you. God approves of you. And He has something better in store.

Friend, don't die with the treasure still inside you. Keep pressing forward. Keep reaching for new heights. Give birth to what God had placed in your heart. Don't let other people talk you out of your dreams. Listen to what God says about you, not all of the negative voices. When you have rejection and disappointment, don't stay there. Know that God has another plan. That closed door simply means God has something better in store. You may not have experienced God's favor in the past, but this is a new day. You have not seen, heard or imagined the wonderful things that God has in store for you. Don't be weighed down by the distractions and disappointments in life; instead, keep stretching to the next level, reaching for your highest potential. If you do that, I can tell you with confidence your best days are in front of you. God is going to show you more of His blessings and favor, and you will become a better you, better than you ever dreamed possible."

~ Excerpt taken from the book Become a better you written by Joel Osteen

Remember though, God can't have just a piece of you, He needs all of your devotion and heart if you want Him to fulfill the God-given desires that are in your heart. He won't fulfill the dreams that are not of Him, and that don't line up with His Word, The Bible. He can't bless your life either, if you are walking in blatant, willful, disobedience to His Word. You must surrender your will to His, if you want to go forward in life.

~ Nikki Fairbanks

Here's more about what Mr. Osteen writes about . . . .

"If you will have the right attitude, you will give birth to more in the future than you've lost in the past. Quit looking back. This is a new day. It may seem like your dreams have died, but God can resurrect your dead dreams or give you brand - new ones. He is a supernatural God and when we believe, all things are possible!

God has not given up on you; He knows that He put seeds of greatness in you. You have something to offer that nobody else has. He's given you noble dreams and desires. When one door closes, God will always open another. If all the doors close, He'll open a window! God always wants to give you a fresh beginning. He still has a great plan for your life. Do you know when that's going to happen? It will commence the moment you quit looking back. Whenever you quit grieving over what you've lost. Nothing will keep you from the good things of God as much as living in the past! Instead of focusing on your mistakes and dwelling on your failures, let it go and receive God's mercy. Yes, you've made some mistakes, you've made some poor choices, but I know that God has another seed. I know He has another plan . . .

"What happened in your past is not nearly as important as what is in your future" ~ Joel Osteen

Just my honest feelings . . .

"Missing"

Please, please forgive me, But I won't be home again.

Maybe someday you'll look up,

And, barely conscious, you'll say to no one:

"Isn't something missing?"

You won't cry for my absence,

I know -You forgot me long ago.

Am I that unimportant...?

Am I so insignificant...?

Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?

Even though I'm the sacrifice,You won't try for me, not now.

Though I'd die to know you love me, I'm all alone.

Isn't someone missing me?

Please, please forgive me, But I won't be home again.

I know what you do to yourself,

I breathe deep and cry out,"Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?"

And if I bleed, I'll bleed, Knowing you don't care.

And if I sleep just to dream of you

I'll wake without you there,

Isn't something missing?

Isn't something...

Can you stop the fire?

Can you stand to fight her?

You can't stop the fire, you won't say the words.

Evanescence ~

Worship in Spirit and Truth . . .

As I was reading out of a book written by Gary Weins titled, "Bridal Intercession", I was swept away by the reality and teaching that was brought to light. On page 61 he is talking about the fact that the body of Christ needs a restored understanding of "the majestic beauty of the Man Christ Jesus". He goes on to say that we have become so focused on our OWN personal happiness and on the business of solving issues, having our OWN needs met and pursuing our OWN visions, that we have neglected to FOCUS on "the beauty and majesty of the One who makes it all worthwhile" in the first place!


** Notice the key word above . . . OUR OWN! Sometimes our focus can be way too much on SELF instead of HIM.


When our main focus, time and energies are spent declaring the glory of speaking and singing of that glory from the texts of the scriptures, the reality of doing this is that our hearts become more and more exhilerated in His beauty and passion! In effect, we become more and more convinced that He IS able to do what we need, and to hold until that day the victory He won for us on the cross. This is precisely why He tells us in John 4 to "worship Him in Spirit and truth".



He doesn't want us to do this because He is some sort of egocentric God who must be placated, (to pacify or cause to be more favorably inclined, or to gain the good will of) by little people telling Him how important He is.


He desires us to be focused on His loveliness and to declare it to HIm night and day for OUR OWN BENEFIT, that we may see His power and glory and become convinced that He is able to keep us.

***Worship and adoration increase our sense of His majesty and puts our hearts at rest in faith and confidence! ***

When worship is focused on the beauty of the Lord, not for the sake of my comfort, but simply for the sake of adorning Him, the unexpected happens. I, in fact, come to a greater sense of peace and rest than when attaining peace and rest was my goal!

The knowledge of Christ sets us at rest. The shulamite in the Song of Songs knew that the best way that she could come to a place of rest and ease was to focus on the beauty and the excellence of her King.

( Excerpts taken from the book, "Bridal Intercession" written by Gary Weins)

I believe that this IS the key to any lasting relationship; making Christ the center place in our hearts and focus, and worshipping Him out of that place. When we do this, the love of Christ spills over abundantly into our other relationships, causing us to have the capacity to love others with HIS LOVE, not in our own fleshly capacity. Our conditional, selfish, limited capacity to love will ALWAYS fail, but His love NEVER FAILS . . .

~ Nikki Fairbanks

Praying for our inner man . . .

I recently read a post on praying for our inner man written by Mike Bickle out of the International House of Prayer. I thought it was so good that I felt the need to share it! We need these types of prayers to strengthen us, especially with the hour that we live in, at these pivotal moments in what I, and many others, feel to be the last days before the return of Christ. It is so important that we not lose heart and focus of what God is trying to do in and through us. We need to have open hearts, full of humility and humble to reproof and correction. It is only through a broken, contrite heart that the Lord can truly use us for His purposes. I myself, have fallen so short of obeying God's word and His standards, and I am so honored to know that despite my righteousness being as filthy rags, His beautiful grace and mercy cover me like a shield against the accuser of the brethren. His banner over me IS love . . . .

Praying for Our Inner Man

By: Mike Bickle

It is very important to pray for ourselves.

One aspect of prayer is to pray for ourselves, and specifically to pray for the strengthening of our inner man. This is often neglected, and yet it is a powerful reality. The most important part of our lives is our inner man, the place where we fellowship with God. It will remain for all of eternity. There is much grace that God is willing to give concerning our inner life with Him, but He is waiting for us to ask.


A great acronym for personal prayer concerning our inner man is the word FELLOWSHIP. We come before God, and we ask Him for:


F – Fear of God. We pray, “Father, give to me the fear of the Lord. Release Your presence in a way that causes me to tremble. Unite my heart to fear Your name.”

E – Endurance. “Father, strengthen my spirit with endurance, that I might do Your will with zeal and diligence, especially in difficult circumstances. Direct my heart, by the Spirit, into the endurance and patience that Jesus walked in.”

L – Love. “Father, pour out Your love into my heart by the Spirit. Release divine revelation of Your love and affections for me, and let it overflow back to You and to others. Take the reigns of my heart and direct it into the vast ocean of Your love.”

L – Light of glory. “Father, let me see the light of Your glory. Give me encounters with the Holy Spirit. Give me dreams and visions and angelic visitations as You gave to Moses, Ezekiel, Isaiah, and John.”

O – One thing life focus. “Father, strengthen me to maintain a life in Your word. Give me grace to be a person of one thing. Give me grace to be one who sits at Your feet regularly. When I lose this focus, speak to me, that I might realign my heart and my schedule to have this focus.”

W – Walking worthy (holiness/purity). “Father, strengthen me to walk in a way that You consider worthy of my highest calling, that I might escape all compromise and stand victorious in full obedience.”

S – Speech. “Father, set a guard over my lips as I set myself to obey You. Free me from defensive, angry, and foolish speech.”

H – Humility. “Father, teach me how to walk in lowliness. I want to take Your yoke of humility on my life in my attitudes, speech, and actions. Give me wisdom on how to live before Your eyes in love, purity, and humility.”

I – Insight and wisdom unto intimacy. “Father, give me insight into Your word, Your will, and Your ways. Give me wisdom on how to live before You that I might walk in intimacy with You. Let me know what You are thinking and feeling. Let me know the secrets of Your heart.”

P – Peace. “Father, strengthen my heart with supernatural peace that overpowers fear and anxiety. Give me an abundance of Your peace, joy, hope, and comfort, that I might not sin.”

Mary "Louise" Blunt ~ April 25, 1930 - Feb. 18, 2009

"The Value of Mystery" . . .

I have been reading this incredible book written by Pastor Bill Johnson from Bethel Church in Redding, California. It's title is called "Dreaming with God", and it has been bringing so much perspective and value to my life. I have been through so many "ups and downs" in my walk with the Lord over a period of the last few years, but I believe that God is wanting me to recognize areas in my life that He wants me to surrender in, and teach me the art of "submission" and "obedience". I can honestly say that I have failed miserably at both, but I am equally grateful that even in my weakness, I am lovely to him, and His grace endlessly abounds for me. Please read this excerpt from the book and ponder these things that are written. They will be life-changing for those who find the truths written, and truly grasp what is being said.

"THE VALUE OF MYSTERY"

"God hides things for us, not from us."

An intellectual gospel is always in danger of creating a God that looks a lot like us; one that is our size. The quest for answers sometimes leads to a rejection of mystery. As a result mystery is is often treated as something intolerable, instead of a real treasure. Living with mystery is the priviledge of our walk with Christ. It's importance cannot be overrated. If I understand all that is going on in my Christian life, I HAVE AN INFERIOR CHRISTIAN LIFE! The walk of faith is to live according to the revelation we have received, in the midst of the mysteries we can't explain. That's why Christianity is called the faith.


*** All too often believers abandon or dilute their call in order to feel better about the things they cannot explain. ***

Consider these truths . . .

To allow what we cannot answer to downgrade what He has shown us is to be carnal minded!!

Too many obey what they understand , thus subjecting God to their judgements.

God is NOT on trial; WE are!

A true Cross-walk is obeying where we have revelation in spite of the apparent contradiction in what we cannot explain.

To obey when we see that there will be a FAVORABLE out come IS NOT OBEDIENCE!

Obedience is supposed to be expensive.

To embrace what He has shown us and to obey what He commanded us, often in the midst of unanswerable questions, is an honor beyond measure. It is a great priviledge to be a believing believer in the midst of a culture of unbelief. We must embrace this priviledge. No Christian should be unmoved by the Lord's question, "When I return, will I find faith on the earth?" I have set my heart to be His pleasure by living in faith.

"THE POWER OF THE OFFENDED MIND"

When Jesus felt it was time to minister in His hometown of Nazareth, He went to the synagogue. As He began to teach the people, they were quite amazed at His wisdom. They were also very impressed with the healings they were seeing. But when they realized they knew Him, having watched Him grow up, they were offended in their "reasonings". "It is Jesus. We know His brothers and sisters. He grew up here! How can He do this stuff? And where did He get this wisdom?" They were not offended in the typical sense; their feelings were not hurt, nor were they caught up in bitterness. They simply could not put two and two together and arrive at the conclusion - their Jesus was a miracle worker and a man of great wisdom. It didn't fill them with wonder and awe. Instead it caused them to be hardhearted and reject Him! This unresolved question became the mental stumbling block that was strong enough to shut down Jesus' anointing to perform miracles and teach with power. To have questions is healthy; to hold God hostage to those questions is NOT.

***It sometimes creates an atmosphere that fulfills it's own prophecy about the power of God not being for today. It shuts down the very anointing that would teach them otherwise.

**Not understanding is OK. Restricting our spiritual life to what we understand is not. It is immaturity at best. Such a controlling spirit is destructive to the development of a Christ-like nature. God responds to faith but will not surrender to our demands for control.

A person's heart is more clearly seen by what they're willing to embrace without offense, than by their expression of faith only in what they already understand. . . .


"HOW WE LEARN"

I'll never forget when God first began to opwn up the scriptures to me. As I read, my heart leapt within me over the richness of what I was reading. Yet I couldn't have taught on that particular passage if my life depended on it. My spirit was doing the learning and my mind would have to wait. The mind is trained through the experience of divine encounters and supernatural experiences initiated through the revelations from Scriptures. Revelation that doesn't lead to a divine encounter will only make us more religious, teaching us to embrace external standards without the internal realities.

God is not opposed to the mind; He created the mind to be a complement to all that He had made. He is opposed to the unrenewed mind. It is at war with God, being incapable of obeying Him. (see Romans 8:7). The believer who governs his Christian life through the mind is the carnal Christian that the apostle Paul warned about. (see 1 Corinthians 2-3). The soul can only lead us into religion - form withour power. It is what makes way for Ishmaels instead of Issacs.

It's important to understand the learning process. Our spirit is where the HOLY SPIRIT dwells. Our spirit is alive and well and is ready to receive great things from God. When I filter everything through my mind and remove what isn't immediately logical, I extract much of what I really need. Only what goes beyond my understanding is positioned to renew my mind. (see Philippians 4:7). If we can learn more about the actual voice and presence of the Lord, we will stop being so paranoid about being deceived by the things that we can't explain. Usually those who use the natural mind to protect themselves from deception are the most deceived. They've relied on their own finite logic and reason to keep them safe, which is in itself a deception. They usually have an explanation for all that's going on in their walk with the Lord, by criticize those who long for more.

Our hearts can embrace things that our heads can't. Our hearts will lead us where our logic would never dare to go. No one ever attributes the traits of courage and valor to the intellect or the strength of human reasoning. Courage rises up from within and gives influence over the mind. In the same way, true faith affects the mind. Faith does not come from our understanding. It comes from the heart. We do not believe because we understand; WE UNDERSTAND BECAUSE WE BELIEVE!! (see Hebrews 11:6). We'll know when our mind is truly renewed, because the impossible will look logical . . .





"MYSTERY - A CROSS FOR THE MIND"



What we don't understand is sometimes as important as what we do. It's one thing to obey when He has given us understanding about a matter, and quite another to obey while facing questions and circumstances that seem to contradict what we understand. So many fail at this point, and then bring the bible down to their level of experience.

MANY DO THIS TO FEEL BETTER ABOUT THE FACT THAT THEY ARE LIVING IN

COMPROMISE -

A COMPROMISE OF THEIR REVELATION FROM

SCRIPTURE.

OUR CHALLENGE IS INSTEAD TO BRING OUR

LIFESTYLE

UP TO THE STANDARD OF GOD'S

WORD. . .

To embrace revelation with one hand, and embrace mystery with the other, forms a perfect cross. This is a cross that everyone who is hungry to do the works of Jesus will have to carry. God must violate our logic to invite us away from the deception of relying on our own reasoning.

Wings . . .

Here are the lyrics to one of my very favorite prophetic songs from husband and wife team worship leaders Kimberly and Alberto Rivera, appropriately called "Wings". It makes me cry like a baby everytime I hear it - I KNOW that God's promises for me are still true . . .

~WINGS~

Nothings gonna hold me back
I'm gonna fly so high
So high away
Fly

When I saw some of you
You took from the Lord your NEW wings
You had this look on your face that said, "Yeah, these are new
But I still have the memory of how it felt when I flapped my broken wings"

And I saw this fear in your eyes
What will it feel like to flap my new wings?
Will I have the pain? Will I still remember?
And then I saw the Lord, look into your eyes
And they penetrated and then He said, THE PAIN SHALL CEASE
He said, "Even the MEMORY shall be released
Even the pain I shall take upon Myself"

"For I will NOT give you a NEW THING that will cause you pain
So DON'T BE AFRAID to fly
For eveything that I give is good
You will Fly in My goodness
Fly in My love
Safely under My wings
You will fly in My faithfulness
Fly in My comfort
Fly in My mercy"

"So STAY CLOSE to Me
Fly with Me
Don't EVER go away"

***** If you would like to hear this song, simply click on the "widget" at the upper right hand corner of my blog,

right under the "About Me" section . . . *****

Painting by Sonnet Hardgrave - See her website at: http://www.belovedsonnet.com/

My future . . .

"He sets on high those who are lowly, and those who mourn are lifted to safety" . . .
"Be the lifter of my head, be the lifter of my head, be the lifter of my head, tonight" . . .

This song was recently birthed into my heart by the Lord for this season I have been walking through in my life. It is such a beautiful thing that the Lord has used the Holy Spirit who lives inside of me, to minister to ME through the songs that HE inspires me to write!! Our God is SOOO creative, yah?! I am so encouraged that God's promises in His word are for us when we believe them and stand, even if it takes every last thread of hope for us to hang on to. I know of this personally; it's what I've lived through this past year. But I have a HOPE and a FUTURE knowing that the God of this universe is in love with me and desires for me to flourish, no matter what the circumstances are that surround me! I don't have any answers, I don't even have a clue, but I know that if my eyes are firmly fixed on the Lord, He WILL guide me every step of the way! I wake up every day thinking, "Lord, I don't even know how this day is going to turn out, but I know that "You are working in my afflictions, and my afflictions are working for me!!", as Jason Upton says. You see, all of these afflictions (daily battles, spiritual and physical) we face daily have a purpose; we are finding out that we are literally DEPENDENT upon God for everything - we cannot do anything separate from Him!! (Oh sure, we can, but we'll mess everything up REAL GOOD!! I have . . . )

I love Jeremiah 29:11, so much in fact that I have memorized it, and whenever I feel like my situations are completely hopeless, I am reminded about what GOD says about my future, and it helps me to stop believing and agreeing (yes, I said AGREEING) with the enemy, and his plan of deception to destroy my life! If we are not agreeing with what the word of God says about our lives, we are coming into agreement with the enemy, and his lies and whisperings of hopelessness, loss of direction and purpose! Read all of these different translations; any way you read them, they are all encouraging!

NET © For I know what I have planned for you,’ says the Lord. 1 ‘I have plans to prosper you, not to harm you. I have plans to give you 2 a future filled with hope. 3

NIV ©

biblegateway Jer 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

NASB ©

biblegateway Jer 29:11
‘For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the LORD, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.

NLT ©

biblegateway Jer 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

MSG ©

biblegateway Jer 29:11
I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out--plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.

BBE ©

SABDAweb Jer 29:11
For I am conscious of my thoughts about you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you hope at the end.

NRSV ©

bibleoremusJer 29:11
For surely I know the plans I have for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare and not for harm, to give you a future with hope.

NKJV ©

biblegateway Jer 29:11
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope

We all experience obstacles and go through life's trials. When we find ourselves in these situations we must not give up. We must do our part and continue living and being fruitful. God does have a plan for us but His plan might not be on our timing. We must pray to God and when we do, He WILL listen!! We must seek Him with all of our hearts. Then and only then will we find Him and He will bring us out of our captivity to experience the plans He has for us. And finally, God does indeed want us to live an abundant life here on earth but the true plans He has for us will be realized when we meet Him.

*******"I am tearing down all of the old foundations in your life, so that I, the Lord, can build new foundations; foundations built on love, trust, purity, respect, honor, kindness and goodness! And behold, the LATTER shall be GREATER than the FORMER!!!!"*******

I have received this prophecy by many different solid, grounded believers of God, more than a half a dozen times this past year!!! (I think the Lord is trying to tell me something, eh?!) I am open to WHATEVER the Lord has in store for me; my heart is open to receive what His will and plan for my life entails, and it may just shake up everything that I thought it looked like from my current perspective!!

Potential Requires Participation . . .

So I'm reading this really awesome book written by Bill Johnson, Pastor of Bethel Church in Redding, CA. It is titled, "Strengthen yourself in the Lord", and there is a section that really awestruck me, simply because it has brought some clarity to me regarding God fulfilling His purposes in my life. Read on if I've sparked your interest . . .

"We are living in a time when the Lord is restoring this revelation to His people - that the blood of Jesus was not shed merely to save us from our sins, but to restore us to a relationship with God in which we partner with Him as kings and priests to bring the planet under His rule and reign. We have delagated authority to establish His kingdom wherever the sole of our foot treads. But the fact is, while God calls us "kings", the degree to which we walk in that position is a matter of potential. And as Larry Randolph points out, God is not responsible for making us reach our potential. "

*** "A lot of believers think God is not fulfilling the prophetic words over their lives because they have missed the fact that the word was pointing to their potential, which requires their participation." ***

"God won't fulfill your potential because he wants you to become a mature believer who thinks and acts like Him out of your own free will. Mature believers are those He can TRUST with the secrets of His heart because they will not use the favor He gives FOR THEIR OWN PURPOSES, but for His" . . .

See my hands, See My face . . .

Hi Friends! I just wanted to share an amazing prophecy given by about God’s heart of love towards us as and His ability to heal us when we seek His face. As we are healed, we become equipped to share His love and power as a testimony for others to be saved!
Please take the time to read this powerful vision and prophecy received from the Heart of God to Catherine Brown of Gatekeepers Global Ministries. You can read about more incredible prophecies and visions given by God to His children in these last days at:

http://www.elijahslist.com/

"We are called as apostolic ambassadors to carry His heart of love to the nations so that the nations may experience the love of His heart."


"I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! For they are ripe for harvest." John 4:35b
In a recent vision I received, some people approached the Lord and reached out to touch the hem of Jesus, in much the same way as the sick woman who had bled for twelve years (Mark 5:25). It struck me how these dear ones were so heavily burdened and how much the Lord wanted to heal them with just one look of love from His eyes. Have you ever been in that place of being bent over and reaching out in desperation to the Lord for help? It is so important to know He is always willing and always able to lift up our heads and flood our beings with His healing power. As if in affirmation, the Lord spoke in the vision, "See My hands, see My face."
As more people approached the Lord, they held onto His hands, but nonetheless, they seemed unable to look into His loving face. So often, we read how Jesus took others by the hand and healed them. His look of love shattered chains of sickness, bondage and oppression from sin and compelled even the dead to respond with resurrection life. As I pondered how our hands are used for works, the Lord said, "All fruitfulness flows from holy intimacy with Me."

We are healed for harvest, and each one of God’s children has a testimony to the Risen Christ that will bless others as it is shared. The Lord Jesus desires for us to have a worship mindset that embraces holy works. From this place of relational security, the Holy Spirit will produce His witness to Christ through us. If we try to approach the harvest from any other perspective than His love, we are in danger of running on empty. Intimacy with God is everything, and without this, we have nothing of any worth to offer to the world.

We cannot hope to be Jesus’ hands if we have never seen His face, and yet we cannot see His face unless we receive His pierced hands. In this, we find the paradox of grace. Seeing the Cross is about first believing, and in believing, we perceive and see Him more clearly. In gazing upon the loveliness of Christ, we are blessed to receive the Father. Jesus said, "Anyone who has seen Me, has seen the Father" (John 14:9b).

FACE TO FACE

In the midst of this revelatory experience, I had another beautiful vision of a good friend of mine who has been used by the Lord to usher in revival in a number of nations, including Mozambique. Jesus held my friend face-to-face, and as He held her, rivers of live giving waters poured out from Jesus’ belly through her. As He held her in His love-gaze, I watched the flow of His love cause nation after nation to be born again. This picture is not just for one, but for all of those who will answer the Master’s call to preach the Gospel of the Kingdom and make disciples of all nations. It occurs to me that the most profound experiences we have, take place in the inner sanctum of our hearts, where the Lord creates moments of holy communion with us in which we are forever changed.

Jesus longs to hold each one of us in a personal face-to-face encounter. When we behold His face, we are enabled and motivated to become His hands reaching out to a hurting world. The birthing of multitudes is born out of the secret place. The secret place of Christ, the Bridegroom King, is where His inner gaze captivates our hearts and makes us lovesick, causing us to overflow from His love. Face-to-face is a place where we are enabled to trust God fully and to rely completely on His love.

Time alone with Christ enables us to surrender in adoration to God’s will. Seeking the heart of God is a precursor to seeing His power manifest in our lives and through our lives, into the nations of the earth. God is asking us to restore the altar of devotion as an inward response to His glory. The outward manifestation of such devotion will be fruit that will last for all eternity.
The inner gaze of Christ is a multifaceted experience--a secret moment, a holy tryst and a private place of pilgrimage where Christ becomes our all-in-all and when all our defenses and distractions melt away in the silence of communion with our Savior. The inner gaze of Christ may be described as a place of divine encounter and surrender, when our hearts acknowledge the Lord in absolute obedience and adoration to His will. The inner gaze speaks of a time, a place or a season when our souls become saturated in God’s presence, and from this, we often receive a fresh commissioning to walk and work with our Redeemer.

Each one of us is brought to a fresh realization of our need to be filled to overflowing with heavenly manna--the sustenance that can only be found in the rest of the Lord. The writer of Song of Songs tells us that the Bridegroom King has been captivated, "with one glance of your eyes." God longs to remove the veil from our eyes, so that we might know Him more. In such holy moments, the Lord reminds us that He is all-powerful, all-knowing, eternally present, and overflowing in unconditional love. The Lord is captivated by His beautiful Bride, but perhaps we do not always fully comprehend how deeply we are adored by our King of Kings.

FACE TO FACE IS ABOUT HAVING HIS HEARTBEAT

Recently as I waited with Jesus, He reminded me that I need to remember to rest in His love and not always be concerned about "the next assignment." As I pondered my deepest desire to be one with my Savior, I realized that I needed to stop and just breathe deeply of His presence and allow myself to receive His love. God began to speak to me about how those in the battlefields must find rest in the company of the Commander of the armies of Heaven. God spoke of His great longing for lonely leaders to come and find fellowship with Him and allow Him to fill up the empty places. He spoke to me of His grace to dismantle every place of defense in our hearts and allow His love to complete us.

When God meets us in such encounters, it is a uniquely individual experience. To the sinner or the saint who seeks the Savior, "they will look on the One they have pierced" and in return will receive the magnificent grace of Christ. One of my most favorite and lovely verses in the Bible is when Jesus looks at the rich, young man, "Jesus looked at him and loved him" (Mark 10:21). Jesus probably knew before He spoke that the young man couldn’t do the one thing that was needed: to give his all for Christ--but not even this rejection could prevent Jesus from loving him.

Time spent in God’s presence ploughs the furrows of our hearts, planting the seeds of His will and His word deep into our beings to bring forth fruit at the appointed time. When we are alone with God, He is able to both prune and nurture us and bring our minds, will, and emotions into alignment with His perfect plan for our lives. Jesus softens the hard places in us and refreshes the dry places when we make time to worship Him. He readjusts our spiritual eyesight in the places where we are blind to His compassion, so that we are enabled to view things from His perspective and not our own. His eyes of fire are irresistible and draw us to Himself, compelling our consciences to bow down in humility and reverent awe. Jesus wants us to know that lowly is lovely!

THE THREE ALTARS: DILIGENCE, DUTY AND DEVOTION
In a vision, I was shown three altars in Heaven. One was called the "altar of diligence," one was named the "altar of duty," and the third was the "altar of devotion." Each heavenly altar was truly exquisite, and each burned with a different size of flame, yet, devotion burned the brightest. These altars represent witness (diligence), works (duty), and worship (devotion). The altar of diligence is where the standard of His love is outworked in our actions. The altar of duty is an altar of grace where faith and action meet to do good works, and humility enables us to emulate the obedience of Christ.

On the altar of devotion, I saw beautiful jewels in the flames. This is an altar of love and worship, and the one on which our lives can be spent, bringing much joy to Jesus. On this altar, the fire of the Rock of Ages descends to refine the precious jewel of our faith, producing Christ-likeness in us. Devotion to Christ releases the atmosphere of Heaven into the heart of a worshipper.
Jesus taught, "Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God" (Matthew 5). When the altar of devotion burns brightly, our hearts are purified because of the time spent in His holy presence. The eternal purity of Jesus’ love reveals His heart in us, and we see Him as He truly is.

This "seeing" is not so much about physical vision; rather, it is about being anchored in a covenant relationship of knowing Him and being known by Him. Loving Him creates a desperate longing in us for more of Him, and this earnest longing becomes a catalyst for Godly transformation in our lives. When we are in love, we will reflect His radiance.
True discipleship seeks simply to be like the Master. Converting others is not our primary goal. However, we will positively influence others with the salvation message of the Kingdom when we surrender our lives in honor to God. It is not the vastness of our revelatory knowledge or the clarity of our theology that will capture those whom Jesus has ransomed by His Blood; it is the evidence of our being ravished by holy love and wasted on the wonder of being His which will cause the lost and the prodigals to discover their Redeemer King. What might that evidence look like? It is simply holy, forgiving love that has no earthly agenda.

We run into God’s heartbeat for a myriad of reasons, and the Lord longs for us to run out of this encounter with His passion for the multitudes and His Bride. We are called as apostolic ambassadors to carry His heart of love to the nations so that the nations may experience the love of His heart. The Holy Spirit sets our hearts in alignment with the Father’s heart. We are anointed and appointed and commanded to love, to teach, to preach, to witness of the Risen Christ, and to make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey the Lord. My prayer for each of us is that our onward journeys of faith flow from face-to-face encounters with the Lord.
God bless you as you discover (or rediscover) His love for you today.

Catherine Brown

Gatekeepers Global Ministries